GMAT考试-AWA作文6分范例

篮球火

考前就写了2个argu
考试的时候就感觉打的比较慢
个人推荐上5分的办法，两篇文章都要写到480++最少！！！字数是王道
上文，大家可以看下，简单用点模板，然后就是胡扯就可以了。随便找三个观点反驳下，argu的部分。
issue部分就是，头尾段，然后中间三段论述就可以
不需要高深的词汇，只要思路清晰即可，大家都可以做到
加油

The following appeared in a memorandum from the Director of Human Resources to the executive officers of Company X.
“Last year, we surveyed our employees on improvements needed at Company X by having them rank, in order of importance, the issues presented in a list of possible improvements. Improved communications between employees and management was consistently ranked as the issue of highest importance by the employees who responded to the survey. As you know, we have since instituted regular communications sessions conducted by high-level management, which the employees can attend on a voluntary basis. Therefore, it is likely that most employees at Company X now feel that the improvement most needed at the company has been made.”

In this argument, the author reaches the conclusion that most employees at company x now feel that the improvement most needed at the company has been made. The basis for this argument is that in a survey, improved communications between employees and management was consistently ranked as the issue of highest importance by the employees. At first glance, the argument seems convincing, but it omits some concerns that should be considered in the argument.

First, we should know who responded to the survey and whether employees are honest when they were surveyed. For example, if the employees who are surveyed in this investigation cannot represent the majority employees in the company x , the accuracy of the survey should be doubted. Moreover, when employees are surveyed, they usually tended to respond as others did. In a company, employees always wanted to be considered a team player, they did not want to be someone who was often left out by the whole team. In this case, some employees might dishonestly responded to the survey if a lot of people ranked improved communications as the issue of highest importance by the employees. Accordingly, the author did not provide enough evidence to prove that the survey is correct and available.

Secondly, even if the survey is convincing as the author mentioned, the authors stated that the company instituted regular communication sessions conducted by high level management and employees would voluntarily attend these sessions. However, the author failed to consider that the high level management might not be effective. In the survey, employees ranked the communications between employees and management as the highest significance. In this scenario, the communication conducted by high level management would not be effective. For example, employees expect to have better communicaton with management, however, the communication session is conducted by high level management. Employees may feel uncomfortable to participate in this session if they feel it is difficult to communicate with high level managemnt. Moreover, communications between low levels and high levels in a company is usually very difficult and low-efficiency. In this case, the communication session would not work out.

Finally, the author said that most employees at the company would feel that the most needed improvement has been made. This conclusion is not persuasive as well. Even if we acknowledge that the communication session is effective for this company, we cannot easily make the conclusion that this session is the most needed improvements. There are several ways for a company to improve the communications between management and employees. For instance, in an Internet company, the best way to improve communications can be provide employees slack time to exchange ideas and innovation thoughts. Also, in food industry the best way to improve commucation skills might be discuss how to work efficiently in a conference. Each company has its own quality and feature, so we cannot say that held a communication session is the best way for company X to enhance the communications.

In conclusion, the author failed to provide information to make the conclusion that adopt the communication session is the best way to improve the communication in Company X. In order to make this conclusion ,the author would have to prove that the survey conducted in the company is convincing at first, and then the high level management is suitable to hold communication sessions. Moreover, the author also have to demonstrate that the communication session is the most needed improvements for company X. In this case, the author can make the conclsuion.

篮球火

下载链接：http://forum.topway.org/viewthread.php?tid=213394&extra=

The following appeared in a memorandum from the information technology department of a major advertising firm:
“The more efficient a firm’s employees are, the more profitable that firm will be. Improvements in a firm’s information technology hardware and software are a proven way to increase the efficiency of employees who do the majority of their work on computers. Therefore, if our firm invests in the most powerful and advanced information technology available, employee productivity will be maximized. This strategy ensures that every dollar spent on enhanced information technology will help to increase our firm’s profit margins.”  

In this argument, the author makes the conclusion that it is a good strategy for the firm to invest in the most powerful and advanced information in order to increase the firm’s profit margins. The basis for this argument is that the more efficient a firm’s employees are, the more profitable that firm will be. The reasoning is also based on the idea that improve a firm’s technology hardware and software can increase the efficiency of the employees who work on computers. At first glance, the argument seems convincing, but further information should be considered to draw the conclusion.

篮球火

Firstly, it is unreasonable to say that the more efficient a firm’s employees are, the more profitable the firm will be. Some other factors other than efficiency should be considerd to make this conclusion. For example, at some companies, employees are really productive, while the companies is not in a good financial condition. Companies have to provide opportunities and equipment for employees to have a better performance. In this scenario, companies have to invest a lot of money to improve the performance of employees. There some several cases in the world business market that companies are really efficient while they do not make a lot money. Accordingly, the author’s idea is not well supported.

Secondly, the author mentions that the firm will make employees more produtive if they invest money on technology hardware and software. However, the author does not provide any evidence that employees in this firm use computers a lot. What if this firm is hand making based or resource based? For example, for some woven companies, which feature at the hand make product, they do not use computer that often compared with other Internet or comupter based manufacturing companies. How could we expect there is going to be an increase in the productivity when we invest money on computers when the company is not computer based? Thus, it is unreasonable to conclude that the firm should invest money on technology hardware and software.

Finally, the author states that the strategy will ensure every dollar spent on enhanced information technology will help to increase the firm’s profit margin. This statement is not convincing as well. Even though it might be a good way for the company to invest its money on enhanced information technology, there could be some other ways for this company to improve its profit margin. For instance, a company can adopt a new strategy to reorganize its structure or provide employees some training courses to increase its profit margin. There is no reason to say that the money invested on information technology will ensure a profit.

In conclusion, the author makes a conclusion that the firm will increase its performance of its employees by adopting a new strategy focused on technology. This argument is not convincing as above reason stated. The author would have to provide some information to prove that to improve efficiency is the most important way to increase the profit of a company. Moreover, the author also has to prove that the employees in the company use computers a lot and there is no other way to improve the profit margin other than the new strategy. If the author can provide more evience to support his opinion, the argument would be more reasonable.

篮球火

The following appeared in a memorandum from the Director of Human Resources to the executive officers of Company X.
“Last year, we surveyed our employees on improvements needed at Company X by having them rank, in order of importance, the issues presented in a list of possible improvements. Improved communications between employees and management was consistently ranked as the issue of highest importance by the employees who responded to the survey. As you know, we have since instituted regular communications sessions conducted by high-level management, which the employees can attend on a voluntary basis. Therefore, it is likely that most employees at Company X now feel that the improvement most needed at the company has been made.”

篮球火

In this argument, the author reaches the conclusion that most employees at company x now feel that the improvement most needed at the company has been made. The basis for this argument is that in a survey, improved communications between employees and management was consistently ranked as the issue of highest importance by the employees. At first glance, the argument seems convincing, but it omits some concerns that should be considered in the argument.

First, we should know who responded to the survey and whether employees are honest when they were surveyed. For example, if the employees who are surveyed in this investigation cannot represent the majority employees in the company x , the accuracy of the survey should be doubted. Moreover, when employees are surveyed, they usually tended to respond as others did. In a company, employees always wanted to be considered a team player, they did not want to be someone who was often left out by the whole team. In this case, some employees might dishonestly responded to the survey if a lot of people ranked improved communications as the issue of highest importance by the employees. Accordingly, the author did not provide enough evidence to prove that the survey is correct and available.

Secondly, even if the survey is convincing as the author mentioned, the authors stated that the company instituted regular communication sessions conducted by high level management and employees would voluntarily attend these sessions. However, the author failed to consider that the high level management might not be effective. In the survey, employees ranked the communications between employees and management as the highest significance. In this scenario, the communication conducted by high level management would not be effective. For example, employees expect to have better communicaton with management, however, the communication session is conducted by high level management. Employees may feel uncomfortable to participate in this session if they feel it is difficult to communicate with high level managemnt. Moreover, communications between low levels and high levels in a company is usually very difficult and low-efficiency. In this case, the communication session would not work out.

Finally, the author said that most employees at the company would feel that the most needed improvement has been made. This conclusion is not persuasive as well. Even if we acknowledge that the communication session is effective for this company, we cannot easily make the conclusion that this session is the most needed improvements. There are several ways for a company to improve the communications between management and employees. For instance, in an Internet company, the best way to improve communications can be provide employees slack time to exchange ideas and innovation thoughts. Also, in food industry the best way to improve commucation skills might be discuss how to work efficiently in a conference. Each company has its own quality and feature, so we cannot say that held a communication session is the best way for company X to enhance the communications.

In conclusion, the author failed to provide information to make the conclusion that adopt the communication session is the best way to improve the communication in Company X. In order to make this conclusion ,the author would have to prove that the survey conducted in the company is convincing at first, and then the high level management is suitable to hold communication sessions. Moreover, the author also have to demonstrate that the communication session is the most needed improvements for company X. In this case, the author can make the conclsuion.

xiaoshuangzi

路过，进来看看！